long distance relationship Archives

When medical school forces couples apart, students face tough realities

Medical students dish on the messy, tender, and surprisingly philosophical reality of long-distance relationships during med school, from navigating five-hour drives and FaceTime rituals to deciding whether love can survive diverging lives on opposite sides of the world. Dave is joined by co-host M1s Cory Karasek and first-timers Elizabeth Meyer, Margaret Huang, and Jonah Albrecht — each bringing a completely different version of the long-distance story. Liz is making it work with her boyfriend Riley, who logs most of the miles so she can keep studying. Jonah is bracing for the moment his girlfriend Victoria leaves for PA school hours away, still figuring out the logistics while trying not to be, as he admits, aggressively Type B about the whole thing. Cory brings the perspective nobody wants but everyone needs — the relationship that didn’t make it through the distance — somehow managing to be funny, honest, and more or less at peace about it. And Margaret? Well, she opens with “I catfished you guys” and proceeds to deliver an unexpectedly beautiful take on love, friendship, and a 15-year long-distance best friendship that started on Skype in fifth grade.

If you’re wondering whether your relationship can survive medical training, this episode won’t give you a formula — but it’ll give you something better. You’ll walk away with real talk on how to have the big conversations before distance hits, when “figuring it out as you go” works best, and how intentionally folding your partner into your new world can be the thing that keeps you from drifting into strangers. It’s warm, it wanders, it goes places you don’t expect — and somewhere between the insider trading jokes and the onesie party bus tangent, there’s genuinely useful stuff in here for anyone trying to love someone from far away while also surviving med school.

Episode credits:

Producer: Dave Etler

Co-hosts: Cory Karasek, Elizabeth Meyer, Margaret Huang, Jonah Albrect

The views and opinions expressed on this podcast belong solely to the individuals who share them. They do not represent the positions of the University of Iowa, the Carver College of Medicine, or the State of Iowa. All discussions are intended for entertainment purposes only and should not be taken as professional, legal, financial, or medical advice. Nothing said on this podcast should be used to diagnose, treat, or prevent any medical condition. Always seek qualified professional guidance for personal decisions.

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Is work-life “balance” the right framing?

Is “work-life balance” a myth in medical school? What do successful students do to manage leadership positions, marriage, kids, and academics?

Our co-hosts–M2s Zach Grissom, Megan Perry, Sarah Upton, and Chase Larsson–lead specialty interest groups, student government, advocacy organizations, and their learning communities; all of their roles compete for their time. Then someone asks if they want to start a new thing, and somehow they say yes. even if they say no. It’s a mystery how that happens.

We break down what happens when “getting involved” becomes “drowning in responsibility,” especially with that otherwise pretty sweet 18-month preclinical timeline that makes succession planning feel like a game of musical chairs with first-years who are still learning how to med school.

But here’s where it gets interesting. These aren’t just resume builders—our students are genuinely passionate about their causes, from organ donation advocacy to single-payer healthcare organizing to…podcasting! They’re learning that leadership isn’t about balance; it’s about accommodation. Sometimes the leadership thing gets bumped for the anatomy exam. Sometimes you’re editing a newsletter while your kid bounces off the walls. Sometimes you realize you’re not actually superhuman, and that’s okay.

Also, Short Coat listener Evan asks us how do we manage a parenting, marriage, and medical school without losing your minds? Our conversation gets brutally honest about the reality of parenting through M1 year, the myth of work-life balance, and why some students might feel “infantilized” by the medical school experience while others are changing car batteries in business attire between classes or trying to meal prep while being tutored (that doesn’t work, BTW).